In honor of the newest missionary...

My brother Reid is one of the freshest missionaries currently serving with 54,000 others around the world for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. We are all so proud of him. Last Wednesday I cried so much I couldn't make any more tears come out, but at the same time I was ecstatic. In Reid's honor I have promised to listen to only rap music for 2 years until he returns. No but really...Here are a few of the things we are all going to miss:

-Reid's humongous t-shirts that are really like dresses.
-Reid's dinner table humor (usually slightly off color).
-His lovely habit of mooning everyone (ok that was cute when he was 2 but now?).
-Being made fun of for being a liberal (me) and being a player (Hayley). Neither of the preceding statements are true incidentally.
-Reid punching Dad all the time, "just for fun."

After we managed to get Mom (sobbing) out of the Missionary Training Center (I'm spelling everything out for those that don't speak Mormon), where she left her only son, I thought she might have a breakdown. But she held on pretty good and even took us to Cafe Rio, although even my favorite pork taco salad couldn't abate the cryfest. We know he's going to be great, and we can't wait for his adventures! (We just keep telling ourselves that.)


On a slightly lighter note, Bryan and I went to the Hotel Del Coronado on Thursday to realize my holiday dream of skating on their ice rink (beachside). Well, Bryan informed me on the way there that he had never been ice skating before. When we got there, the rink was so melted that people were making wakes behind them while skating...Beside the fact there were no adults on the whole rink. I decided one fall in that kind of mess would leave Bryan freezing, sopping wet, and miserable. Oh well, maybe next year the ice will be icier! We did get some pretty sweet photos though!

More coming after the holidays...

Turkey Trot

So we did a little Thanksgiving 5k last week to benefit Father Joe's efforts to nourish San Diego's home-challenged. I, for one, did not set any land speed records but I did feel a lot better about eating the ridiculous delicious dinner spread that night. I will, for your enjoyment, list off some of the sights we saw at one of San Diego's largest turkey trots (in Balboa Park--always a scene of randomness):

-Dogs in strollers
-Dogs in front packs
-Infants walking on leashes (just kidding but that would have been ironic)
-Miniature dachsunds walking a mile a minute
-Participants wearing indian headresses and pilgrim hats
-Mr. and Mrs. Claus (wearing full garb) cheering on runners at the finish line. Mind you Mrs. Claus was wearing a mini skirt and Santa was wearing shorts but whatever, this is San Diego.
-Someone wearing a plush turkey as a hat, while running full speed
-People twice my age who finished before me
-Last but not least, the source of this week's Quote of the Week..."Look, the real Father Joe!!! Right there, under the tent. Everyone look!"--Darcie. And it was. He looked slightly dazed but nevertheless benevolent.

Also I saw the Christmas lights at the Mesa, Arizona Temple. I was amazed and astounded by all the different colors as well as the sheer magnitude of the light display. I mean camels and wise men made from lights, you are kidding right? Not to mention the delicious Mexican food that came after...

Does this look dangerous to you?

Because it certainly startled me when I turned around and saw that giant owl looking like it was ready to peck my eyes out. Turns out she was well-behaved (thankfully) and was not attacking the lady behind us, she was being trained by her. Welcome to the San Diego Zoo...where the animals get so close they scare you. Just a tip, do not sit at the top of the stadium during the Sea Lion Show. Our feathered friend here did a dive bomb to start the show that literally almost gave me a mohawk. Bryan of course thought my little shrieking reaction to our neighbor (when I first saw her) was hilarious.

Just another day in San Diego. We love our animal friends around here. I think I have spent more time in the last year observing marine and land animals than any person should. I mean, what is my problem? You haven't seen me excited until you have seen my face during the Shamu show. It brings out the kid in you (I even think that's what the commercials used to say).

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone! We are excited to be splitting the time between home sweet home (here) and Arizona. I hope you all have a wonderful time feasting on way too many calories and being way too happy about it. I know I will.

Man with a Pashmina

Yep, that's what Darcie and I saw the other night while driving home. We saw a man riding his bike across the street, in the dark, wearing a patterned pashmina around his shoulders. He was also eating some sort of snack food while steering his bike with one hand. For some reason or another this struck me as very European. Maybe I figure that if men can wear capris in Europe then they can wear pashminas. I don't pretend to understand how my mind really works. And for those of you who know the area, this was not in Hillcrest. It was on Governor Drive. Some of you may not know what a pashmina is...let me provide the official wikipedia definition:

"Pashmina accessories are available in a range of sizes, from "scarf" (12" x 60") to "wrap" or "stole" (28" x 80") to fullsize shawl (36" x 80"). Pure pashmina is a rather gauzy, open weave, as the wool cannot tolerate high tension. The most popular pashmina fabric is a 70% pashmina/30% silk blend, but 50/50 is also common. The 70/30 is tightly woven, has an elegant sheen and drapes nicely, but is still quite soft and light-weight.

A pashmina shawl can range in cost from as little as about $35US for a pure pashmina scarf or up to hundreds of $US for a super high-quality pure pashmina shawl. They are known for their softness and warmth. A craze for pashminas in the mid-1990's resulted in high demand for pashminas, so demand exceeded supply."

And many of you know I love quotes of the week. I am going to make an effort to start a quote of the week here on the blog. This may only last one week so don't hold me to it, but this week's quote:

"What's wrong with getting married? I do it all the time." --Christy (married to Gabe...see blog at right)

I am now going to eat my dinner which consists of mint M & M's. I discovered yesterday that they have been reincarnated for the Christmas season already. That may be the only Christmasy thing I can support being marketed before Thanksgiving, only because I will be living on a steady diet of them until New Year's.

What a WILD fire...

Yesterday we had the opportunity to go up to Ramona and help out with clean-up efforts for fire victims. Hundreds of people met at the Church building up there and were given assignments (as well as yellow shirts) to go out to specific homes in the area and do whatever was needed. We had the job of cleaning up a burned down 4-car garage and shed. I was saddened as I scooped up burned Christmas ornaments, children's toys, and homemade art projects. But as I stood there amongst the rubble the woman that lived there came out. I said to her, "It looks like you had a lot of valuable stuff in here. I'm so sorry." And she turned to me and without hesitation said, "Yeah, but its just stuff." What an amazing spirit of resilience and priorities these people have. And she's right, everything is just "stuff." How grateful you become in times like these to have family and friends safe and sound.

On a lighter note, what a great project. Those of us who had never imagined ourselves construction workers took down walls, moved metal frames, and got to wear SAFETY GOGGLES! Watching Jeremy try to engineer a 700 lb pile of melted shingles onto a burned dolly with no tires had to be one of the most hilarious moments of my day. The best part was when he started directing everyone to place it based on the angle it would take to get it into the dumpster. Only an engineer, and believe me we had plenty of them yesterday. Bryan worked hard at getting as dirty as possible and I basically got some sort of ash spa treatment on my entire body. We loved it.



A random tibit...I have recently realized that I HATE doing my hair. Everytime I get out of the shower I let my hair air dry as long as I possibly can and then when it is time to finish it (e.g. use this lovely tool the blowdryer) I get all annoyed. I put it off as long as possible and then I'm bitter at my hair the whole time I'm doing it. What is THAT? Do I need counseling? I have the lowest maintenance haircut I could possibly talk the stylist into and it is still too much work...

Martha Stewart here I come...

So last week I tried to make Halloween sugar cookies in the spirit of the season and all. Being that I hate dressing up I have to celebrate in other ways (e.g. cookies, forcing people to attend the Haunted Hotel, etc.). I bought this special food coloring in black and orange to decorate my festive cookies. Of course, I did not read the box and when I went to use it I realized that it was "convenient gel." WHAT? The convenient gel ended up splattered all over my kitchen after I had to use a fork to basically fling it into the homemade frosting. Even though it made a ominous black color, I would venture to say that its execution was less convenient than handy liquid coloring drops. And I wasn't too blessed about the stains it left all over my fingers. All in all, I guess it was worth it because Josi accused me of trying to outdo everyone's favorite homemaker convict extraordinaire with my creations. A small scale food coloring disaster is little price to pay for cookie beauty.




And in other, much more exciting news...

Don't worry, my mom only wishes this one was mine. Sunday, 5 peas in a pod became 6 as we welcomed little baby Audra into the world. The cutest baby in San Diego had a multitude of instant fans, me included. Isn't she so sweet? See Amy and Aaron's blog for more details! Congrats A-team, thanks for taking one for the team and giving us all a new mini cuddler!

Tragedy at home

Today before I went to work, I went to Qualcomm stadium to donate some goods. This was one of the most emotionally conflicted experiences I have ever had. Amidst sadness, great tragedy, and a feeling of hopelessness the strength of the human spirit and hope shone through. Neighbors helped each other in a parking lot full of tents and camping chairs. Children and pets were cared for as San Diegans lined up to donate blood. The line of people waiting to drop carloads of supplies was as long as the line of people coming for refuge. What appeared to be a modern refugee camp was also a giant support group. Armored trucks, Wal-Mart semis full of donated supplies, a makeshift hospital, and free concession stands were all present as this community suffers together and works toward healing.

I have lived here all my life and this is the greatest crisis I have ever seen. All our San Diego family who have lost so much are in our prayers.

Yeah RIGHT

Somebody needs to get this thing checked out...Flattering but totally unrealistic. Hey, I'll take it. Props to TJ, Krystle, and myheritage.com. Sorry for being a copy cat but the dang site wouldn't let me save this unless I put it in a blog.

Also this may be the only time in my life someone tells me I look like Catherine Zeta-Jones.

Tag

See I was always the fat kid that got tagged in Elementary school. Being the easy target did not make me overly fond of this game. Now I've been cyber-tagged by Christy who no doubt was the skinny girl in hip Guess jeans that made my life miserable.

Alright fine, I'll play. I've lost a little weight since then, maybe it will be fun.

I'm supposed to divulge 6 little known facts about myself. Then tag some of you lucky bloggers to do the same.

1)I'm afraid of dinosaurs. This may not actually be "little-known" but it is embarassing enough that it should be. I hate Jurassic Park, and the sound of velociraptors makes me cringe. Bryan keeps trying to convince me to go to a dinosaur IMAX movie. Apparently he wants me to die from cardiac arrest.

2)I cried in kindergarten soccer. I hated playing and threw a tantrum every time Mom put me in the van to go to practice. The only way I would play is if I had ribbons in my hair to "match my outfit." Even then playing mostly entailed picking dandelions.

3)I once had a male cat I named Flower. Wasn't really fair to the poor thing. I thought he looked like a skunk.

4)Once in college I sprayed adhesive on toilet seats in the bathroom down the hall. Those girls were really mean and ornary. T-Hall girls will support me on this. They deserved it. I know, sweet innocent little me? I'm not proud of this action, but I must confess it.

5)Everyone in my family is taller than me. They call me "midge" (short for midget). Apparently all those grape-nuts instead of sugared cereals didn't do much. By the time the younger ones came along Mom had given up that battle and they've grown as tall as weeds on a diet based in processed sugar and complex carbohydrates. See photographic evidence.

6)I have been goosed more times than I can count by old demented men. And if I had a dollar for every time they tried to touch my hair...

Ok, so I guess I'll tag some of you, if this is a second tag then please ignore. On second thought, you have to divulge a second set of 6 things...

I tag:

Bryan

Lisa C.

Evan

Hilary/Casey

Natalie

TJ

Good luck...

What not to wear...

...for blogs.

My blog was nominated due to its extremely shoddy appearance in public over the last 5 months or so.

Finally it was chosen.

THANK GOODNESS. All of blogdom cheers for the fact that this blog is now pretty.

Mighty props go out to Jenna for helping, couldn't have done it without her. As I'm sure you all have noticed since the blog's inception.

Avian Flu

I think that Avian Flu has in fact, made its way to La Jolla. On Monday night we were having a bonfire (for FHE of course) at the beach. Bryan and I arrived to find Andrea and Josh happily cooking their dinner on the fire while a large seagull was keeping them company. They proceeded to tell us it was "just getting warm." Well when it didn't move whilst Josh picked up wood right next to its head, I informed them that I thought things were worse than they imagined. Growing up in Southern California, I realize that seagulls are good for only two things--pooping on your head and stealing your sandwich right out of your hands. Those birds are not your friends. Spare me with the cricket story right now, they are good for more in Utah apparently.

So, obviously, I concluded that this bird was on its death bed. Andrea became slightly hysterical at this prospect. To make matters worse, when the bird hobbled off a few feet, a large pitbull came and proceeded to try to make our "friend" his after dinner snack. When the owners finally pulled the dog off the bird, it was barely moving its wings but managed to hobble off. Sometime between then and when Bryan and Josh went to look for it, the bird apparently disappeared. This is a mystery. Regardless, a bird carrier of Avian flu is likely unaccounted for. That is no joke. (Disclaimer: This really is a joke. The bird story is real, the Avian flu is not.)

Some other recent findings:
1)I am not a good soccer mom. I drove the twins' carpool last week as the parents were off to the land of General Conference. I did ok until I realized that the 3 texting teenagers I was picking up had puffy-painted shirts at soccer practice. Apparently this is a new trend. When I was younger we just practiced soccer. Anyway, upon my refusal to allow them to bring said shirts inside Dad's truck, they were forced to put them in the bed. And put their cleats on top to hold them down. By the time we got home we had 3 very smeared shirts and 6 cleats covered in neon paint. Whoops. The girls were slightly upset but tried to play it off in order to not crush my hopes of being a successful soccer mom one day.

2)I had my first real run-in with irrational electronics. As a general rule, I have always believed that electronics/computers always act rationally. When they don't work, it is us who are acting irrationally. But the other day, this foundational belief of my universe was proven fundamentally flawed. I was trying to set up a projector with my laptop attached to show a movie at a large Relief Society function. For 1 hour I plugged and unplugged, reset, read manuals, and generally stressed. I knew I was doing it right because I had done 2 such setups successfully that week at work. Well, when I had finally HAD IT, I slammed my laptop closed and it proceeded to work. All the sudden the laptop was connected. WHAT??? The girl that was trying to help me was just as puzzled, her explanation being, "sometimes it just needs a hard start." Irrational behavior from my computer, who knew?

APERTIVO!!!!

So last night we ate at the greatest restaurant. It was a birthday celebration for both Darcie and Josi, and we loved this quaint little place. I, of course, had a fun walk down memory lane eating tapas (though they be Italian and not Spanish). I think the girls were fed up with my reminiscing about sitting at tapas bars in Spain with Emily and eating champinones and croquetas to our hearts' content.

However, if you are not familiar with the concept of tapas you should be. They are basically appetizers, but you order several and create a full meal. It's one of those ways of eating that leave you perfectly satiated (a rare find when going out to dinner).

Check out the website for more details:

www.apertivo.com

Onesies

Babies...Everybody loves them. But nobody more than me! Anyway, so I got a little carried away the past few weeks and imagined myself a crafter. I decided that Amy's little one (coming any day huh Amers?) needed some one-of-a-kind apparel. Clearly I decided to custom applique onesies. Seemed easy enough when I had the idea. Then of course I remembered that the baby needed some matching headbands as well. Just an easy little project. No big deal.

3 onesies, hot glue sticks, special fabric glue, lots of cutting, 4 skeins of embroidery floss, hours at the fabric store, multiple needle sticks later these are what surfaced...Thank you Darcie for providing such wonderful modeling skills. Well hopefully baby likes them in the one time she gets to wear them before they fall apart...Of course you can't see my favorite part. The brown one has a pink heart embroidered on the back near the hip.




At least the middle aged ladies at the shower LOVED them. One lady: "Did you MAKE those?" Me: "Yes." Lady: "Well my son and his wife aren't even pregnant yet but you are invited to the shower." Hmmmm...Hours of sweatshop textile labor for someone I don't even know? Somehow I think the punch, finger foods, and diapers with candy game (all you girls know the one I'm talking about) won't make it worth it.

On the way home from the shower Kristy so lovingly pointed out that the baby will probably only wear them one time before she grows out of them anyway. Thanks for that. I can only hope there will be more baby girls coming down the pike.

"Feel a fool running your stateside games...Oh Mexico"--James Taylor

Let me tell you what I love about the borderland. Mexico to me has two different faces, the one that I see on vacations far away with the family (see Cabo Dolphins post) and the one I see when traveling close to the US border.

Last weekend we went down to Puerta de Fe (an orphanage) near Ensenada. It was my 6th trip in year and some things never cease to amaze:

-The quality of tacos at slightly suspicious roadside stands.
-Manzanita Lift (always better in the southland).
-How amazingly cute those kids are.
-Why in the world Mexico makes it so difficult for us to adopt those kids and take them to the better side of the greatest wealth/quality of life differential in all the world (someone told me that once about San Diego vs. Tijuana).
-People that buy things like creamed corn and churros while waiting in line at the border (would you like some smog with those food items?). Disgusting.

A couple of new things amazed this time:
-Krystle's comment, "One thing I've learned from you Maren--just because you are in Mexico doesn't mean you have to be ghetto." I'm sure glad I've contributed something to her life.
-Peter somehow getting EVERYONE up and out of the campground by 7 a.m. Sunday morning. I said it couldn't be done. O ye of little faith...
-Churros FILLED with gooey chocolate. Enough said. Emily and my dream come true...

Dramamine is not a nice drug

Well now that I have slept off the Dramamine I took a week ago, I'm ready to write about my latest adventure. See, thing is, I took a trip up to Monterey last weekend and I got a little sick on the way back down Highway 1 in Big Sur. The carsickness probably would have passed given a few minutes, but in my deluded and nauseous state I took Josh's advice and pounded not one but TWO generic Dramamine. According to Josh and the packaging this was "non-drowsy" Dramamine. I may sue for false advertising, since I proceeded to sleep for the next 6 hours. I did awaken from my slumber like Rip van Winkle for two stops, at which I sort of wobbled around and then fell asleep immediately when back in the car. About 2 hours into my nap, apparently Josh turned to Bryan and said, "Maybe we should have only given her one pill." Good call guys, but a little too late. Remind yourself that Josh wants to go to medical school. Yikes. My mother actually called in the middle of this hibernation and I answered the phone through the fog. She asked if I was stoned.

Monterey itself was amazing. We stayed at a beautiful beach house, I won't even begin to describe it because that could take up the whole blog. I saw a great white shark in captivity (a small juvenile) at the Monterey Bay Aquarium. I'm sure I was the first on my block since it was the shark's first day EVER on display. Pretty proud of that. Apparently, according to disturbingly small signage, a surfer came in even closer contact with a great white shark in the water immediately in front of the house about 3 days before we got there. Needless to say, I did not go swimming. Although swimming with sharks while on Dramamine could have been very interesting...

My advice to you all is: unless you want to miss an entire day of your mortal life, try those motion sickness bracelets first. Dramamine should definitely be your last resort.

Full House Reincarnated

You may note that this is my second reference to the legendary show on this blog. I will just say I was a little obsessed as a child. So Hayley and I spent every free moment our mom would let us watching reruns of DJ, Steph, and Michelle on the TV. I turned out ok despite this, I think...

Anyway, the point of this is that I lived my Full House dream approximately 3 weeks ago. You are all going to be jealous so remember, you are breaking one of the 10 commandments when you covet this experience. I swam with dolphins. Now when I say "swam with dolphins" I mean, I held onto Olin's (the dolphin's name obviously) dorsal fin and rode around the pool. Ever wonder what that feels like? Sort of like the way I waterski, being dragged behind the boat mostly. I mean I got to dance with, touch, feed, and kiss a dolphin. My poor dad had to spend a fortune on what I'm sure he saw as a ridiculous tourist trap, but he practically made my life. I have begged to do this on every tropical vacation, and apparently the fact that I spent my birthday trapped inside a plane on the Dulles airport tarmac finally broke Dad's willpower and he gave in.

Of course, everyone else was loving it (as you will see from the pics), especially Mom who wants to go back to school to be a dolphin trainer now. Reid had a fear he was going to escape with only one leg intact, so he was just happy that the dolphin didn't have a violent streak.

Furthermore, apparently there are no rules on dolphin cruelty in Mexico because poor Olin was pregnant when she was forced to carry all of us (except Hayley, which if you are smart you will not mention to her since she's slightly bitter) around the pool at high speeds.

Here I am!

I have gotten some requests for a new blog entry (can't figure out why, its only been 1 month), so here we go...It was quite enlightening to realize people actually read this thing sometimes. Must have been a slow day on CNN.com.

So I went to Washington D.C. What to say about that...Let's just say it was AMAZING. One of the most fun trips of my life. Somehow through a twist of serendipity, and some sleight of hand on the part of Emily's brother-in-law, we ended up with a sweet 300C towncar for the Hyundai Accent price. We drove that sucker around DC all week, and people thought we were either really old or gangsters. I'm not sure which. I'm now wishing I had a picture of the car. Darn.

Let's play a game of "High-Lows" with this trip. For those of you who don't know "high-lows" it is a game taught to my by Emily (yes the very same one--she's very talented) and consists of making lists of events. You will soon see (its not complicated). If you have a college education you should be able to figure it out with minimal confusion.

Highs
-Monuments at night. My favorites were FDR and Jefferson.
-Holocaust Museum
-National Archives (letters from Fidel Castro as a child--see this website for a copy--http://www.archives.gov/research/state-dept/rg-84-foreign-service.html) If only we had given him 10 dollars... [link courtesy of Em]
-Gettysburg
-"The Throne of the Third Heaven of the Nations' Millenium General Assembly"- Made of gold and silver tin foil, cardboard, Kraft paper, plastic over wood furniture, and glass. Created by some guy in his garage in DC for 14 years. Its meant for the 2nd coming. Yikes. (see picture #2)
-Becca and Matthias' (our hosts) amazing barbequed pizzas. You heard me right. Made on the BBQ.
-Harper's Ferry frozen custard stand
-A foreign family hiding their take-out food in a dumpster outside the Capitol tour so they could retrieve it later. Yep I watched that happen.
-Georgetown. All of it. If I run away someday that's where I went.
-Don's John. On the lawn of our nation's Capitol. I wanted to use it just to say I had. It was locked.
-Arlington National Cemetary. If I would have had any liquid in my body I would have cried at the Tomb of the Unknowns. Factoid: There are no unidentified remains from the Vietnam War. That tomb lies empty. Cool story if you want to hear it sometime.
-Running from the Capitol down the Mall in the early morning. AWESOME.
-Eating dinner in a restaurant by myself. Liberating, actually.
-The car pictured above. If you can figure out the rebus let me know. I was merely struck by the huge lettering. (see picture #5)


Lows
-Man wading in World War II memorial pond right next to a sign, "Show Respect. No Wading"
-Goose poop. Green and everywhere on the Mall. And on my DC shoes.
-Breaking heat records from 1930. 101 degrees and 80% humidity? No thank you.
-Man vs. Wild on the National Mall. 12 noon. Everyday. Who knew it was only 2 blocks across? Felt like the Sahara.
-Greek cab driver who decided that I must be a liberal and support public displays of homosexuality since I'm from California. Proceeded to give me a lecture on his very scary views on the topic.
-16 hour day in the city. x2.
-Swimming in a disturbingly warm Potomac River. Em and I wondered what was going on upstream.

Also, Becca and Matthias have the cutest son, Benjamin. He is hilarious. He could not remember my name so he called me "Friend" all week. I loved it. He also would yell out "See me!" for "excuse me" and "dotter" for all things unknown (e.g. "friend, look at the dotter!"). At one point he saw me doing Pilates in the basement and tried to convince me that I couldn't do it without a "movie," then went and pulled out his mom's Pilates DVD's. What a kid!

Just a disclaimer. This post really does not do the trip justice.

It is hotter than...

(nice try--you WISH I would swear on my blog)...blazes...chili peppers...an oven...Mazatlan in August...my car's engine driving through Las Vegas...possibly even the surface of the SUN.

I am really very fed up with the heat level in this house, as well as all the houses and buildings I have been in today. This may be the sole reason that I could end up believing in global warming. I tell you what, it NEVER got this hot around here when I was younger. And the past two summers have become unbearable at points.

Last two days I have taken freezing cold showers. Today I even plunged myself into the ocean in my workout clothes just to try to lower my soaring body temperature.

And I quote from the National Weather Service, "JULY WEATHER IN SAN DIEGO...UNDER THE PROTECTIVE BLANKET OF MOIST AIR FROM THE PACIFIC, TEMPERATURES ARE LOW FOR
THE LATITUDE. THE DAILY MAXIMUM TEMPERATURE RARELY EXCEEDS 85 DEGREES. THE HIGHEST TEMPERATURE IN JULY WAS 100 DEGREES IN 1930...HOT...HUMID WEATHER IS ALMOST UNKNOWN."

Raise your hand if you feel protected by the blanket of the Pacific. Anyone? I didn't think so.

Now, mind you, I know there are many of you out there who live in much hotter climes. However, you likely have air conditioning in your homes. Rare is the home in coastal San Diego that has central A/C, we just don't have the infrastructure for this kind of heat.

In light of this suffering, I am going to list the things I have recently found to be handy in providing relief from the heat (if only temporary):

-Carrying around a 10 lb bag of ice from the grocery store
-Building a fort in the living room with white sheets as the roof, then blasting a fan into it
-Freezing cold showers (already mentioned above)
-The ocean (also already mentioned above)
-Driving around in your car (those ALL come with a/c thankfully)
-Drinking lots of cold lemonade (sometimes too much)
-Ice cream
-More ice cream

How to make a Dumpling

Last Sunday I learned how to make a certifiable Chinese dumpling. It was amazing. Let me in fact walk you through the steps.

1)Take small "dumpling wrapper" (looked like a mini tortilla covered in flour) and finger paint water around the edges.
2)Fill with William's magical pork concoction (not too full or it won't close, Jenny knows that from hard experience).
3)Fold over into a half-moon shape and seal moistened edges--see #1--together. I hate the word moist but its the best descriptor in this case.
4)Decoratively fan the edges by folding pleats in the tortilla wrapper thingy. In my non-creativity I would have chosen to skip this step and leave them plain, but the dumpling Czar (William) wouldn't allow it.
5)Repeat steps 1-4 over 100 times. Ok maybe not that many but that's what it felt like.

I had several difficulties with this new skill. First being I could not figure out how much to put in the wrapper. Second, my fingers were too clumsy to make the pleats look nice. Third, I couldn't figure out how to keep the flour from turning into homemade play-doh all over my hands when it mixed with the water.

Successes of the evening included lining up the dumplings properly on the pan (so as not to incur the wrath of the dumpling Czar), reliving my days of childhood finger painting (only with water this time), and forcing James to make "just one more." And, of course, eating the little pockets of goodness.

Overall, I feel like a pro at dumpling making. And to think someone (no names to protect the innocent) almost convinced me not to go for the pre-dinner lesson. I never would have appreciated those scrumptious morsels without all that hard work!

These are highly sought after and rare pictures of non natives constructing the elusive Chinese dumpling.

Summer Reading

As most of you know, in approximately 6 weeks I will be embarking on my yearly trip to Cabo. Where I will lay by the pool for 7 days, read books, and drink virgin pina coladas from the swim-up bar. Maybe surf a little with my brother and dad. Ok, you are wondering, why are you telling us this?

I need suggestions for reading material poolside. It is imperative I take at least 7 books with me, as I generally read 1 per day. Unless it is young adult lit (on Emily's suggestions) in which case I can read 2 per day. Please submit your ideas for my summer reading enlightenment. I would love it!

This is a picture of the circumstances I will be in come August 10-17 (from previous year's albums)...

Costco and Sushi

No, not sushi from Costco. Two separate topics. Sushi and Costco are two of the most amazing concepts available to commercial America. Let me extol to you the virtues of these two wonderful things.

1)Costco--Where in the world can you find prices on food that never go up? The ice cream there, at the food court, has been $1.55 as long as I can remember. That is AMAZING. Also, who knows how they can give you such great prices on memory foam, iPods, and hummus all under the same roof. Not to mention, the fantastic capabilities of the Photo Center (upload online for pickup in 1 hour), bakery, and pizza (what is it 8.95 for a large pizza?). Once I popped a tire and I had the greatest service ever at the Tire Center, and they are incredible because no matter how busy they are your car is always ready in 45 minutes. That doesn't even happen at the Jiffy Lube sometimes. I am currently sitting next to an extremely quiet tower floor fan which was purchased at the one and only Costco. My favorite pillow came from Costco. I can get 6 toothbrushes for 12 dollars (I love brushing my teeth). Where else can you get samples of beef jerky and protein shakes from 80 year old ladies wearing hairnets (don't worry because my grandma used to be one)? And, to boot, it was started right here. I shop at the ORIGINAL Costco warehouse, a little info for you history buffs out there lest anyone was thinking this post has no substance.

2)Sushi---I will never understand how sushi can fill you up but never make you feel like you overate. It is like it has a magical capability to satiate your hunger perfectly. Every time. How does it do that? There are an infinite amount of different sushi rolls, a great thing for someone who loves it as much as I do. I never get bored with sushi because each restaurant is like a whole new experience. Let me also say that NEVER in my life have I sat in a velvet booth with curtains around it and adjustable lighting until I started eating sushi. Said booth is at Harney Sushi, love it. I mean who can hate the idea of raw fish and salmon eggs wrapped up in a piece of seaweed? DELICIOUS. No, truth be told, when you put it that way it is a weird food. But so incredibly delicious. And nutritious. Sometimes, but beware the tempura. That will get your arteries every time. Sorry for the graphic description for those of you who think the idea of sushi to be absolutely nauseating. I think I was supposed to be born a mermaid because I've never found a food that comes out of the sea that I don't like...

That being said, the most incredible commercial concept in all the world is El Corte Ingles. That's in Spain. I have a song that Emily and I wrote all about it in Spanish. I will not bore you with the details. Also, I will not write any more here about foreign concepts because this is meant to be a patriotic post, touting only the commercialism of the USA. Yay for 4th of July and FIREWORKS!!!

Maybe you can all comment and post your top two American commercial concepts? That would be fun.

Carnies, Hypnosis, and Heads on a Stick

I bet that got EVERYONE's attention...Let me explain.

Last week I went to the Fair. Apparently now the PC name is the County Fair. But, as a former DMF employee (high school), I can't handle that kind of paradigm shift. No I was not a carnie, contrary to popular belief.

Several years ago I swore off the Fair. Something about it just wasn't a good time anymore. Maybe it was the whole fam trying to figure out the logistics of who wants to go where and when (someone wanted to see animals, someone wanted ride roller coasters, etc). Maybe it was always having to coerce my little sister into doing what I wanted to do because for some odd reason the parents wouldn't let us run off alone. Something about the caliber of people, going to get kidnapped, yadda yadda yadda. I don't know. Everybody at the fair looked pretty upstanding to me. Except the one year when a gang shooting shut it down early.

I decided to try the Fair again this year, thinking maybe the nostalgia of a childhood spent there would make it worth a trip. I was shocked to discover that the Fair, with just adults, is SO MUCH FUN!!! Just eating, hanging out, watching the hypnotist. Only once did I miss the good old days when I saw a lady trying to fit her twins in a double stroller through a narrow doorway. Not that I don't love kids, but it was so much less hectic! And we only stayed for 5 hours, instead of the 10 I would routinely pull off as a child in the ride zone. I feel like I owe my parents an apology for all the times I made them stay until the Fair closed so I could get in "one more ride." Funny how being an adult gives me a different persective. (Yes, I did just call myself an adult.)

All in all, a surprisingly relaxing little afternoon. We saw lots of fun livestock, including piglets in an enclosure modeled after The Three Little Pigs. We even saw Kenny Loggins in concert to end a perfect day. Everyone sang along to the Pooh Corner song (much to my dismay since that song creeps me out), and I realized I kind of like Kenny. I think we were the only people under 45 in the whole grandstand (with the exception of Hayley+entourage), but we LOVED it! "Even though we ain't got money..." C'mon I know you are all singing along in your heads.

I guess you are probably all wondering about the head on a stick. It really just made a good opening line, but we did see a man who bought some sort of souvenir that looked like a long walking stick with a shriveled head on the end. Who knows.

See pictures for me with my favorite food (churro), Bryan with his favorite animal (pigs), and Kenny on stage...

Pooltime!

I would like to introduce you all to my favorite little girl on the planet (outside my own sisters...who aren't really little anymore). This is Lilly. Lilly has been having parties with Josi, Darcie, and I since she was 2 months old. She used to sit at the table on someone's lap and laugh at the jokes during girl talk when she wasn't even old enough to crawl. We love being her honorary aunties when her real aunts aren't here. In fact, I got my only valentine this year from Lill.



When Lilly turned 1, her mom Hillary was a little concerned about her starting to talk. Lill learned to do sign language and started gaining a few words here and there. Well, I am happy to report (I know I may be the only one who gets excited about these things) that Lilly is well above age-appropriate with her speech/language now. Yesterday she turned to me while swimming in the pool and said "I love the swimming pool TODAY!" Then she exercised her complete control over all of us by giving me directions to go "this way" and then "that way" all over the pool. Now this is a child who loves the camera and the camera loves her...I was taking pictures of her at one point and then I stopped. The next thing I knew she was going to do some little trick and turned to me and said "Camera?" She wasn't going to do it until I took a picture of her.

Also, baby Owen is the newest addition to the family. He's pretty cute too. You'll see him with Auntie Jos. Lilly thinks he is her little doll which is pretty great to watch.

Hilarious. Love those kids. Check out the slideshow of our little princess at her pool party yesterday.

Tips and tricks for better Engagement photos...from an expert of course

It's wedding season everybody!!! And you know what that means, lots and lots of cute posed pictures hanging on my refrigerator. Now, for those of you who have never had an engagement photo taken I'm going to let you in on a little secret. There are some very serious rules one must follow. Above, my lovely models have agreed to demo a few surefire poses that will leave everyone smiling when they open your invitation. Disclaimer: neither of the couples above are engaged (or even couples for that matter).

I will say that I found some reputable advice on the internet, but none lived up to my expectations. I don't think any are tailored to the LDS community...Which is, as we know, one of the only cultures to send out a photo with every announcement. So, I decided to make my own.

Let's give the top 10 tips, David Letterman style:
10. Always wear matching outfits
9. Two options for backgrounds: beach or hay bales. Take your pick.
8. Make sure you spend plenty of time in a tanning booth right before the pictures.
7. NEVER EVER wear your hair in a style you would on a normal day, that would be so weird.
6. Poses where the man is using his brute strength are always pluses (as demo'd in #3 above).
5. Never use a candid shot. Instead use a posed shot that looks candid.
4. If possible, print the picture directly on vellum for the announcement. People love vellum.
3. Always photoshop out what you don't like from the landscape. Don't worry that you have now created a fictional place. And also, don't forget to use photoshop on yourselves.
2. It is imperative you take at least one shot of someone popping up behind the other/on the other's back. Usually this is the girl, but hey if you guys want to ride piggyback... (#1 and #2 above)
1. ALWAYS ALWAYS show the ring.

Disclaimer #2: No one currently on my fridge has made any of these mistakes...But after years as a YSA I've seen it all.

Mysteries of Male Behavior

To begin this post I would like to quote from my favorite British heroine, Georgia Nicolson of Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging fame (calm down, its young adult lit)--

"If a boy says 'See you later,' it might mean 'Leave me alone, it was great while it lasted but I am not ready for anything more serious,' or it might mean 'See you later.'"

There are a few mysteries of male behavior I have recently noted. Maybe some qualified and loyal readers of my blog can enlighten us all on the following inexplicable habits:

1)Packing away dirty laundry when moving--it smells 10 times worse when you get there

2)Rubbing their sweat on other humans as a joke

3)Wearing black tube socks with sneakers

4)Fighting.

I will here explore the research on fighting. It is a male habit that I truly do not understand. I know that you all believe that it is gallant and all, especially if you are fighting in my behalf. I assure you it is not. And I am not the only one who thinks this. Seeing men fight gives me that awkward feeling in my stomach like I just want to hide my eyes and run away. Let's see what the world wide web has to teach us on the subject:

At the Answer Bank website, a highly educated blogger wrote: "Like many things in life I think man (as a species) is much more an animal than we believe. Many things we do in life are deeply routed in our minds and fighting is one of those things. Back when man had to 'fight' for every last scrape of food he needed to be able to defend himself and his tribe/group. At times we go back to these old habits..."

A REAL article from the The Sydney Morning Herald by Michael Flood informs us that male on male violence is the most common form of public violence. But there's good news for those of us who can't stand the fighting..."As long as a culture of aggression and male honour persists, violence will continue to happen, and men (and women) will be injured and killed. Violence experienced by women has received widespread public attention, and rightly so. But the routine violence between men is rarely the subject of public debate. The good news is that traditional definitions of manhood, based on bravado and aggression, seem to be declining. With the rise of “sensitive new age guys”, involved fathers and even “metrosexuals”, we’re seeing a shift to a more peaceful and respectful male role. But too many men are still caught up in the fiction that you have to be “10 feet tall and bulletproof” to be a real man." Thank goodness for metrosexuals is all I have to say...Changing the world one stylist at a time.

And for those of you out there who feel like you don't fight well enough (because obviously, based on this blog, girls love it), you can order several instructional tapes on how to fight at http://www.dirtyfighting.com/.

Q: Is everyone wearing all white to the wedding...?

And other such tales of adventure (see below for the answer). Don't worry, no wedding here...Just an infamous quote of nonsense. Believe me, it makes as much sense to you as it did to me.

This has been the week of the Torrey Pines, as I am now calling it. I was there 3 times this week. Props to all who accompanied me on the adventures, each one was different and special. Checking out the sunset, hiking, or running, it is a spectacular little place. Not to mention that it is named after the rare Torrey Pine tree, native to coastal Southern California. I do think 3 times in one week is some kind of record though, maybe I'll ask Guiness what they can do for me.

San Diego has officially been invaded by tourists. Sayonara easygoing days at the beach and simple bonfires. Last night we had to bring our own pit to the beach because there was some sort of convention going on there (not really but it looked like it). I'm glad that every other person on the planet enjoys my city as much as I do, but I'm also glad they only come for 3 months out of the year. Sea World on Memorial Day weekend (I know what you are thinking, "no you DIDN'T!!!") is enough to make anyone a hermit until September.

Also, tonight I saw a presentation about the Dead Sea Scrolls. It was very interesting and enlightening but I came out of there with one very burning random question (those of you who know me well will not be surprised): HOW IN THE WORLD DO THEY UNROLL THOSE THINGS? Once I tried to unroll a piece of art I did in kindergarten and it practically fell apart. And that certainly was not stored in a ceramic jar for thousands of years. Can't wait to see them live and in living color.

I think I am out of random topics right now. Coming soon, an entire post devoted to the art of sushi in a plush booth...Stay tuned.

(A: Only if you are getting married on a Puff Daddy video)